Disturbing Auctions

Posted by Robbie Thursday, May 15, 2008, 8:03 AM PST
Robbie
Watch eBay for an epidemic of pipe cleaner bears, coming soon.

Coming soon: "How to Make Pipe Cleaner Cats and Mice". Now, honestly, if you know how to make a bear, surely you'd be able to make a cat without further instruction.
Mahatma Kane Jeeves
I want to know how to get the bears to clean my pipes . . .

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 7:20 AM PST
Merlyn
for all those Gunnar Hansen fans out there

The Wife Test (#35593)
Posted by Mahatma Kane Jeeves Thursday, May 15, 2008, 7:12 AM PST
Mahatma Kane Jeeves Merlyn
The one test you really shouldn't cheat on...

or get caught cheating
444
Can't you test them BEFORE marriage?

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 7:03 AM PST
Merlyn
"Looks Great"

Thats a matter of opinion

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 6:58 AM PST
Merlyn
"If you don't like the tinted fluid, you can replace with pure vodka"

If we don't like the octopus can we have the vodka anyways?

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 6:54 AM PST
Merlyn
"i hope that someone can enjoy it as much as i did"
Robbie
Not a... with three prongs. I'm not bidding until I'm reassured exactly how the owner has "enjoyed" it.

Posted by Robbie Thursday, May 15, 2008, 6:50 AM PST
Robbie
There really was a Norwegian Blue: [link]
Merlyn

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 6:37 AM PST
Merlyn
yeah but can it keep my beer cold?

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 6:31 AM PST
Merlyn
Reminds me of this:

[link]

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 6:27 AM PST
Merlyn
add this:

[link]

and this:

[link]

Posted by Robbie Thursday, May 15, 2008, 5:52 AM PST
Robbie
Different.

Sami can have fun putting the hats on various veggie heads.
Robbie
Sigh... Google is struggling again to put relevant advertising at the top of this page. I'm being offered specialist Chinese porcelain restoration and membership of the Anglofur Forum.
444
Robbie: If you turn off Java in your browser, the Google ads disappear on DA, and the Auctiva, Vendio and other galleries on eBay pages don't work so the pages load faster. I use one browser with Java and cookies turned off, and a different one with them on for sites that require them.
Robbie
The Google ads don't bother me, and DA loads in a flash. Google Adsense's desperate searching for ads to match the text can be very amusing.

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 4:31 AM PST
Merlyn
yikes!

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 4:30 AM PST
Merlyn
Old school keyboard...I like it

Posted by Merlyn Thursday, May 15, 2008, 4:25 AM PST
Merlyn
Yes, a vibrating yellow duck is VERY creepy
Robbie
"There is a stamping on his backside." Let's all join in.

Squirrel bank (#35581)
Posted by chewmefun Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 10:28 PM PST
chewmefun
why wait until it's full - smash it now!
whyaduck
That's a mighty phallic looking tail ya got there, squirrely boy.
ubertacky
Shhh.. Don't tell Neal there's one visiting our backyard. It's quite tame, can pick him up with no fuss. Eats out my hand, too.
444
uber: You are risking a STD (squirrel transmitted disease). Scroll down to the Appendix (table 4) at [link]
Mahatma Kane Jeeves
Someone in my neighborhood has been feeding the squirrels, I'm trying to make them scared of people again, otherwise you can't even use the picnic table in my yard. Nasty rodents . . .

Dee Bee vase (#35580)
Posted by chewmefun Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 10:26 PM PST
chewmefun
pinkey - bluey
whyaduck
"Mommy lamb is pink"

Babies havin' babies.
444
O'er....

Sign (#35579)
Posted by buairt1 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 9:23 PM PST
buairt1
Slow Grandparents At Play
444
The slow grandparents and slow children are often the result of inbreeding in the prolific Thickly family, found all over the country where you see "Thickly Settled" signs.
whyaduck

Framed Whip (#35578)
Posted by buairt1 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 9:11 PM PST
buairt1
Whip It, Whip it Good!
ubertacky
Perfect gift for the strike-breaker.

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:32 PM PST
444
Cool lawn decor.
Merlyn
looks like this one was slain a long time ago
wyldcat
Why am I picturing the geeks from the cell phone ads using this a follow-on to the wizard?
buairt1
I've always wanted to start my own amusement park.
sam002
That park looked pretty cool, my son would have loved that when he was little.
ubertacky
I might get this if my future furry con theme comes into fruition.

It's titled "Wings and Tails, Feathers and Scales: All the Anthro that's not Furry."

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:31 PM PST
444
Because nothing says Peace on Earth like a battleship.
Merlyn
needs:

[link]
wyldcat
or: [link]
buairt1
I hate gnomes. I don't tell my brother's friends or they will steal them off other people's lawns and put them on mine.
sam002
Looks like it lost the war. For some reason the drummer in that video cracked me up.
ubertacky
I'll bet you'll get this one, too: [link]

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:31 PM PST
444
Action! Adventure! Excitement! Rare Lesions!
buairt1
That went straight to dvd didn't it?
ubertacky
I'll bet the sequel will be called "Revenge of the Flame Throwing Vagina."

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:30 PM PST
444
"16 inches tall, made of some sort of metal and then it has been painted or covered with some kind of plaster...."

Holds some kind of plants, as long as they don't need some kind of water.
buairt1
Hand crapted. More target practice for the farm. I must make a trip to 'god's country' before I start my new job.

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:30 PM PST
444
I never sausage a bottle.
buairt1
There is no value now that the bottle is empty.

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:29 PM PST
444
Ouch.
Merlyn
from the same seller:

[link]

After you sand your ass, you can give it that heathy buffing to a radiant shine!
buairt1
My ass hasn't deteriorated to that standard, thankfully...
sam002
Snap on tools is such a manly sounding name. LOL.
444
Sami: The joke is that John Bobbitt thought so, but the reality is ugly: [link] [link]
chewmefun Robbie
Or twist your nuts until they crack: [link]

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:29 PM PST
444
For your bathroom -- he's ready to hurl. Also see [link]
buairt1
It is almost cool, but something about it bothers me and I'm not sure what...
sam002
Oo ee oo ah ah ting tang walla walla bing bang

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:28 PM PST
444
"every little rust." Yes.
Merlyn
Looks like all the "good" parts were taken...a LOOOONG time ago
Merlyn
Actually the "rust" is probably the only thing holding this baby together
sam002
Air conditioned engine.

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:28 PM PST
444
"...Simply Cosmic." Far out!
buairt1
Those rocks apparently are worth a lot of money. Not bad for a boring hobby.
chewmefun
From Wikipedia: "Most meteoroids disintegrate when entering the Earth's atmosphere. However, an estimated 500 meteorites ranging in size from marbles to basketballs or larger do reach the surface each year; only 5 or 6 of these are typically recovered and made known to scientists." - yet lucky seller has over 500 pcs in lot. one born every minute.

Posted by 444 Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 6:27 PM PST
444
Wingless churbs?
Merlyn
here use this:

[link]

Posted by drasaid Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 5:34 PM PST
drasaid
But dogs are color blind
sam002
Big dog looks like he found a body under the snow.
444
drasaid: Dogs do not see colors as we do, but they are not color blind. See [link]

Posted by drasaid Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 5:27 PM PST
drasaid
one of these today (and the parts kept wiggling)

I'll eat the egg from that bird tomorrow too
sam002
LOL, tickly food.
whyaduck
Hopefully the chicken didn't change her mind and hork it up halfway through. Severe tire damage!
drasaid
No, she ate every bit of the chitin (and it looked like broken black glass)

She wanted the calcium. We had some of those mexican eggs filled with confetti for the kids to smash at the birthday party; we just left the eggshells around. The chickens ate them (as did the wild birds) within a couple of days
444 ubertacky
So that's what happened to my sidewalk chalk...

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 5:10 PM PST
Merlyn
200 years of freedom...
sam002
Have a snappy period.
wyldcat
If I had been born Jewish and male, I would have had my bris on July 4, 1976. *scary mental images of the moil flinching as the fireworks go off*
chewmefun
"And...it's never been used." geez, thanks for that tid-bit.

Posted by Mahatma Kane Jeeves Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 1:49 PM PST
Mahatma Kane Jeeves
Or just be content with looking at the picture . . .
sam002
Oh, those look real. Is that your new screensaver, mkj? I think you need to take "the Test."

[link]
Mahatma Kane Jeeves
Thanks, Sami! They all look real to me, better check again . . .
Merlyn
"The difference between Love and Lust and how to balance them"

balance smalance
wyldcat
Holy crap now that's a Silicon Valley...
chewmefun
mp3 course from trento, TN, Italy. 'Ciao, bella! Looka inna my ayze..'

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 1:15 PM PST
Merlyn
I wonder if this came out on CD?
buairt1
Great for those nights you can't get to sleep.
pittipat
I already know the lyrics....lub dub..lub dub...lub dub...
ubertacky
Good for your "Heart Beats" music collection - it's a jazz band composed of several Texas Heart Institute surgeons. They've put out a record during the band's short run. Sadly, only info is at: [link]

I've got the record.

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 12:18 PM PST
Merlyn
For the hunter who really want to impress
buairt1
Thank god it doesn't sing like that damn trout.
drasaid
Rocking bill spike. Almost big enough for my unpaid ones

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 11:07 AM PST
Merlyn
just in case when one of those pesky emergency axe murder opportunities arise
buairt1
Well, if I'm in an emergency situation, only a pretty hatchet will do.

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 11:04 AM PST
Merlyn
reminds me of the heads in the glass domes on the show "futurerama"
drasaid
"This head will fit dragon bodies and others with slight modifications"

Dragon body? So he will be able to light his own cigars?
buairt1
Merlyn, you read my mind. I just can't get the Futurama image out of my mind. All it needs is some fluid and a glass cover.
chewmefun
LOL! That would be great. You could have a line of Futurama snow-(non)globes too.

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 10:55 AM PST
Merlyn
I would love to stumble into a fast food joint with this on...
buairt1
Yeah, and you order two burgers. One for you and one for the monster and sit around feeding it fries..

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 10:44 AM PST
Merlyn
the colors....the colors
whyaduck
Damn hippies.....
East_coast_trash
That looks like a lot of acid.
Mahatma Kane Jeeves
Woah! Dude! That's too much!

. . .Seriously! Bummer!
Mahatma Kane Jeeves
0 '

< ' ////

* ....

# 0000000000oooo

O 0 ?????????

!!!!!!!!!!!!

- -
pittipat
Uh oh. MKJ is having a flashback!
chewmefun
'You just can't get good acid anymore.' - Captain Acid

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 10:35 AM PST
Merlyn
"A true & natural 1 of a kind piece cant pass this one!!"

Oh yes I can
whyaduck
Isn't that a giant used condom in the center?
buairt1
Just confirms my theory....the people who live in the cold states with long winters don't get enough sunlight...really...

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 10:31 AM PST
Merlyn
Poking 2 million volts of energy with a sharp object sounds moderate to highly dangerous to me
buairt1
Only if I can eliminate some of my pesky neighbors.
ubertacky
You can tenderize a slab of beef with that, though. Be right cool to watch it twitch.

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 10:16 AM PST
Merlyn
$9.89???...

I could just go down to the Jade Pacific Restarant and order a "Skull and Bones". I would at least a slight buzz and get to keep the very same glass all for $4.95
sam002
Or you can get one of these for $4.00 in NO.

[link]
Merlyn
yeah but mine has alcohol included :-)
buairt1
I bought one for .50 at a flea market for my brother.
444
Classier: [link]
chewmefun
Years ago bought same mug with painted hi-lites, filled with Gummy worms, for mrs.chewie for Valentine's Day. F-ing 'a' right I'm a romantic.

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 10:11 AM PST
Merlyn
to scare those tough toilet bowl stains right out of the bowl!
buairt1
hand-painted with loving care...AAAAAH......

Posted by Merlyn Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 10:06 AM PST
Merlyn
everything you want to know about sludge...for only $289!!
whyaduck
A team of intrepid scientists hid in a blind for weeks while recording the wily sludge's every move.
chewmefun
"NATO Advanced Study Institute on Sludge Characteristics and Behavior" - your tax dollars at work.

Posted by whyaduck Wednesday, May 14, 2008, 1:01 AM PST
whyaduck
"When you pull the string all you get is fast gibberish ghost talk, which only he understands."
ubertacky
They must have busted the damn flywheel.
sam002
He's just a little hotbed of germs isn't he?
buairt1
Casper, the dirty ghost, the dirtiest ghost you know...